It is a beautiful May afternoon in Phoenix, Arizona.
{(live: 3s)[The time is 7:30am.(stop:)]}
{(live: 6s)[George W. Bush is president.(stop:)]}
{(live: 9s)[It is the year of our Lord 2005.(stop:)]}
{(live: 13s)[And you, my friend?(stop:)]}
{(live: 16s)[You are...(stop:)]}{(live: 20s)[a [[Scene Kid->Title Screen]](stop:)]}
(set: $checkcomputer to false)
(set: $hair to false)
(set: $makeup to false)For a brief, sweet minute, you doze back off ...
Until your subconscious jolts you awake with 500ccs of pure adrenaline and teenage hormones.
Today's the day that your one true chemical romance, Alex Rose, asks you to the end of school dance! Which is also *tonight*, need I remind you?
It's time to wake the fuck up! No snoozing on this day.
[[*Fine, fine. I'll wake up.* |Stakes]]*Oh, shit, you're right. I've got to wake up! Today's the most important day of my entire teenage life!*
You're damn right it is. Don't you forget that today is the day your true love and chemical romance, Alex Rose, asks you to the end of school dance!
Well, Alex had better ask, given that the dance is also tonight.
Anyway, that's two good reasons to get your gothic ass out of bed!
[[RISE FROM YOUR BED LIKE NOSFERATU |Stakes]]So, last night, your best friend Robyn messaged you on MySpace and told you that Alex was talking to them on AIM. Apparently, Alex Rose was asking about *your* plans for tonight's dance AND if you had a crush on anybody.
If you can just make it through an entire seventh-grade day in 2005 without embarassing yourself, Alex Rose will ask you out to the dance.
Unfortunately, if you make a wrong move today and blow this thing with Alex, you'll die of embarassment on the spot, instantly.
Don't fuck it up.
*Got it, no fucking up here. Let's get up and get this party started.*
[[EXAMINE DOMICILE|Your Room]]Alright, we could do a whole thing in this bit. We could get into some excruciating detail about your clothing, the subtle differences between scene and emo (TL;DR: you wear neon), etc...
''But'' your bus waits for no one, and so we're gonna have to cut to the chase.
What kind of shirt will you wear?
[[A BAND SHIRT. |Pants]]
[[A SHIRT WITH AN ANIME CUPCAKE ON IT. |Pants]]An excellent choice. Like all pre-teen sartorial choices, this will surely have an outsized impact on your day. Life or death, even.
Now, for pants. What style of pants will you be wearing today?
[[CHOOSE SKINNY JEANS -- BLACK->Review]]
[[CHOOSE SKINNY JEANS -- NEON->Review]]
Your limp hair hangs before your eyes ... taunting you.
Time to get this mess in shape.
[[GET TEASING |Hair 2]]So, suffice it to say, your face needs ... work. The kind of work only 2005 makeup techniques as they were understood by seventh-graders can do.
[[GET TO WORK]]
You have teased to perfection, excellently done. The dry shampoo and hair spray fumes bring the snow on the field of poppies in the Wizard of Oz to mind. You sure hope you aren't losing precious brain cells to this daily routine.
But wait! Look beneath the crumpled-up practice doodles (click-replace:"practice doodles")[tasteful Inuyasha nudes.] Is that -- a Bump-It?!
//SWEET! I need a few extra inches of height.//
[[BUMP IT UP|Admire your work 1]]
(set:$hair to true)
(track: 'hairspray', 'play')(if:$hair is true and $makeup is true) [Look at you! You're gorgeous!! Timeless elegance. Neither you nor this look will ever, ever get old.
Now, time to continue getting ready.
[[RESUME GETTING READY|Room - Get Ready]]]{
}(else-if:$hair is true)[Well bumped! You're a vision of loveliness. Now, you need only fix your hideous face with an inch of paint.
[[PAINT IT AN INCH THICK |Make Up]]](else-if:$makeup is true)[Gorgeous. You're a vision of loveliness. Now, you just need to tease that disgusting rats' nest you call hair.
[[TEASE THE RATS' NEST |Hair]]]
"*Hey, honey!*"
Oh, no.
"*Honey, is that you? It's almost time for the bus, okay? Are you ready?*"
Oh, fuck. It's Carol. The Dread Stepmother. How dare she be so kind to you? "Honey"? Who does she think she is?
What will you do?
[[APPEASE |Resolution]]
[[AGGRIEVE |Conflict]]*Might as well play nice. I did use most of her hairspray and makeup, after all.*
"Uh, yes, Carol? I'm ready to catch the bus, I guess. Lemme just grab my iPod."
A moment of pause... Then, Carol comes into your room:
"Hey, sweetie, want breakfast? Oh, is that my hairspray I smell? What's it doing on your vanity? Oh! Are these drawings...?"
//Welp, time to...//[[//DIE//->Die 4]]*Nah, I don't owe Carol any kindness. Let's do this.*
"I don't need your help, Carol! I'm still getting ready for school, anyway! Why can't you just leave me alone?!"
Your stepmom, whom you can't see, calls up the stairs with a tone of voice that is distinctly hurt: "Well, okay, honey. It's 8:30 now, so you should get going soon if you want to catch the bus, okay? But if you need more time, your dad can give you a ride to school of course."
Ugh, what a *bitch.*
[[STRUT OUT OF THERE |Bus Stop 2]]
You race down the street as fast as you can. You wish you could run, but your skinny jeans hamper your movement. You don't really want the kind of chafing that running in skinny jeans in the Arizona sun will give you.
So you hurry down, knowing you have mere moments to catch the bus, but hoping with all the optimism and self-assurance of youth that you'll definitely catch this bus.
[[RUN ]]
[[SAUNTER CASUALLY]]You slink back into your house ignominously. You're worried that you'll actually die of embarassment.
You walk in and see the Dread Stepmom and your father sitting together, drinking coffee and chatting. Their smiles evaporate when you walk in the room.
*Damn.*
"Did you miss the bus, sweetie?"
Do you:
[[SAY NOTHING|Embarass]]
[[SHOW HUMILITY|Humility]]
"Oh, that's okay, sweetie!"
*I wish to die.*
"Your dad can give you a ride to school!"
You look at your father. He is a nice enough man, apart from divorcing your mother and everything. You suppose you could stand accepting a ride in his leased Camry. You suppose.
[[GET INTO THE CAMRY. SAY NOTHING. |Ride]]
//Well, better own up to my hubris. To love is to let someone see you vulnerable. //
"Yeah, I missed it. You were right about the timing, Dad."
Your dad chuckles affably over his cup of coffee. He walks over, ruffles your hair, and pats your shoulder.
"Then I'll fire up the ol' Dadmobile! Give your step-mom a kiss and we'll get driving."
Carol looks up from her newspaper and smiles at you expectantly.
Well, this leaves you no choice, really.
[[DIE->Death]]You are now in a 2004 Camry with your father. The two of you have little to say to each other.
"Hey, kid! I got an Aux port just for you in this car. Do you want to plug in your iPod, show me some of your tunes?"
You deliberate.
Do you:
[[APPEASE |Accessible Music]]
[[ALIENATE |Shouty Music]]Well, you figure that every minute spent sharing your interests with your parents is an invaluable one.
You play one song that you think your dad will like.
As the song goes on, your dad gamely bobs his head to the music. With a big smile, he turns to you and says:
"Say, kid, isn't this from that one movie? What was it ... High School Musical?"
Well, needless to say, you [[DIE INSTANTLY.|Die Instantly 2]]
You put on your most heinous, obnoxious shit.
Luckily, you're too young to know just how confrontational music can get, so you decide to play "I'm Not Okay (I Promise)", just on the strength of the title.
(And Gerard's vocals, okay, who are you even kidding?)
[[BASK IN THE DISCOMFORT. |Bask]]You spend a few genuinely delightful minutes watching your dad's face as he becomes increasingly uncomfortable with your musical choices. Are you trying to tell him something, he wonders. He's been concerned ever since the divorce, and your newfound love of eye makeup and hours spent online have NOT put his mind at ease.
But you've arrived at school before you know it. Of course, you're mortified, but he decides to drive you right up to the school. He wouldn't drop you off a block away, oh no; he's getting wise to your teenaged trickery.
[[WELL SHIT. |Car Circle]]
"Scene Kid," Sesshomaru growls, "I will defeat you... Even if I must overcome my heart to do so."
You ready your weapon -- a super unique scythe on a chain -- and toss your magnificent purple mane. Your eye color changes to red to match your ferocious, belligerent disposition.
The sexual tension? Palpable.
"Then come and get me."
[[FIGHT->Bus Circle]]
Of course you put your middle finger up at those preps. This isn't amateur hour. Anyway, time to move on.
You think you spot the familiar black-and-red hair of your best friend Robyn.
You also see the dirty brown hair of your former best friend Betty.
Oh shit! You see the distinct black puff of Alex Rose's hair.
Who should you chat with?
You go to:
[[YOUR ELEMENTARY SCHOOL BEST FRIEND BETTY |Loser]]
[[YOUR BEST FRIEND ROBYN |Acceptable]]
[[ALEX ROSE |Perfect]]Ignore them?? Ignore some Avril Lavigne-loving, Victoria's Secret Brown Sugar Body Spray-smelling, Hollister-wearing preps?
The preps begin to snicker.
"Hey, scene kid! Nice $accessory!"
Everyone laughs. And you? You ...
[[DIE INSTANTLY. |Death 5]]
(track: 'teenagers laughing', 'play')You talk to Betty. She grins broadly at you, revealing a depressingly metallic smile.
She loudly calls you "Twin-nie," referencing your childhood joke that the two of you are twins.
[[DIE->Death 3]]
You go over to Robyn, desperate for more information about what Alex Rose said last night over AIM.
Robyn is coy and gives you very few specifics.
You're beginning to feel crippling self-doubt take over.
[[GO TO CLASS |Morning Education]]
*Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit...*
Yo, what is up with your genitals right now? Is this normal? Is this puberty? Should you see a nurse?
Alex Rose turns to you... and smiles nervously.
//HOLY SHIT!//
The bell rings. Looks like it's off to Language Arts with you, punk.
[[*Damn.* |Morning Education]]
(track: 'school bell', 'play')Well, looks like it's first period Language Arts. In another lifetime, a class dedicated to critical thinking, unpacking metaphors, and empathy might give you invaluable life skills. But, luckily, it's the era of No Child Left Behind, so you learn the kind of literary analysis that can be tested through multiple choice questions like: "Is this a metaphor?"
Partially intentionally and partially due to your lack of interest and sleep deprivation, you dissociate for the next several hours.
You dream the sweetest daydreams, a phantasmagoric array of Harry Potter, androgynous bisexuals in black denim, and Sasuke Uchiha.
[[RESUME CONSCIOUSNESS IN TIME TO GO TO LUNCH |Lunch]]
(track: 'school bell', 'play')Okay. Take a deep breath. It's lunch time. Also known as teenage fucking Normandy.
//God, why is it stressful ever single time?? I hate lunch.//
You can do this.
You make a beeline for the scene kids table. This is essential to your social survival. To sit elsewhere would mean instant death by embarassment.
... Or would it?
[[SIT WITH YOUR FELLOW EMO KIDS. |Lunch 1]]
[[GO AND SIT WITH BETTY|Death 1]]
You've come to the broad bench of black- and/or bleach-haired scene kids. Perfect. You're at home.
But, alas! Alex Rose is flanked by two different sluts! Who even are these evil (man-)whores, who have committed the vile sin of wanting to kiss Alex just as much as you do?
You have no choice but to sit far away from Alex Rose, with your best friend Robyn or something. How will Alex ask you to tonight's dance if you're at opposite ends of the table?!
What will you do?
[[ASK ONE OF THE POSERS TO MOVE |Showdown]]
[[BIDE YOUR TIME |Lunch 2]]
[[GO GET YOUR FOOD]]*I'll just wait those posers out. No biggie. I am young and the only resource I have is time.*
Very mature observation! I'm not convinced you're a real seventh-grader.
You decide to sit next to Robyn and bide your time. The two of you discuss the real issues of the day: Harry Potter fanfiction on LiveJournal. Would a Gothic Draco Malfoy really wear leather pants? Or would he wear torn denim? There are strong arguments for both sides, so you and Robyn lose track of time until you see...
Your table has been called to go and line up to get your food! You see Alex Rose stand up, but the posers remain seated!!
*This is it!*
[[LINE UP->Line for Food]] Uhh ... interesting choice.
You make your way over to Betty Finn's table, where you see the assembled heads of a variety of children who all attend the same Baptist youth camp every single morning before school. Every single one of them is wearing a pink or blue tee-shirt from Hollister or Abercrombie and Fitch.
As soon as your ass hits the bench, you immediately die from contact-embarassment.
Whoops.
(I mean, what did you think would happen?)
[[TRY AGAIN |Lunch]]"Excuse me," you say in a confident, sassy voice. "Do one of you want to move? Alex Rose and I have something to discuss."
Alex stares up at you with bright blue eyes, rimmed with kohl like an ancient Egyptian deity. And just as you are getting lost in their eyes, you notice a perplexed expression forming in them.
*Oh, no.*
"Umm, are you sure?" one of the hoes says with a derisive snort.
*Oh fuck.*
[[PERISH|Die 6]]
"Oh, cool. I'll get the same thing," Alex Rose says as they pluck out a dish to match yours, "I love $dessert."
(if: $dessert is "Choco Taco (RIP) (2.00)")["Why did you say 'rip' just then?" you ask.
"Oh! Uh, I dunno," they answer, confused. "I had an out of body experience for a second there."](else:)["Why did you say the price just then?" you ask.
"I dunno... I felt a weird compulsion. Hormones, maybe."]
''(Don't worry, kid. Whatever food you pick is fine. No one else is watching you, okay?)''
[[CONTINUE ->Continue 2]]"Sorry, dear. Looks like there's not enough money in the account."
[[COMMENCE DEATH BY EMBARRASSMENT. |Lunch 5]]
"Nah, it's cool. I got it," Alex Rose says as they yank on a chain attached to their belt (and your heart).
A wallet emerges on the other side of the chain, coming out of Alex Rose's massive, baggy black pants like the sun on the other side of the clouds, except even more radiant.
Alex Rose uses cash to pay for your meal.
Perhaps you should simply die now and live forever in this moment?
*No, I must live, if only to awkwardly slow dance with Alex Rose to timeless classics like "Souljia Boy".*
[[Survive]]
You elect to continue living. A dangerous choice.
After you and Alex Rose get your food and you stammer out a thanks, you're too dazed to return to the topic of the dance tonight. You sit back down at your table next to Robyn. Robyn stares at you, waiting for an update on the Alex Rose situation. But you dare not speak, lest you be overheard. Instead, you content yourself with doodling in a notebook.
Each doodle is clearly of Alex Rose, but some are labelled "Gerard Way" and others "Amy Lee" to throw observers off your trail. Very sneaky.
Alas, before you return to your senses, the bell rings.
[[RETURN TO CLASS.]]
(track: 'school bell', 'play')Okay, time to resume your education. This time it's social sciences. Normally, you actually like this class, but today you can't be bothered. You're still too busy doodling in your notebook, smiling to yourself and daydreaming about kissing Alex Rose on the face and maybe -- just maybe -- touching their butt.
Let's get doodling.
[[DOODLEY-DOO->Choose Your Doodle]]
*The teacher definitely didn't notice me packing everything up! I am very sneaky.*
Sure thing, champ.
Whether your 24-year old teacher noticed or not, it doesn't matter. You have everything ready and rarin' to go just as that bell rings.
And for good reason! You need to cut clear across the building in double-time if you want to be casually lingering outside Room 203 when Alex Rose leaves Health class.
And of course you know Alex Rose's schedule by heart.
The bell rings! Move, move, move!!
[[RUN]]
(track: 'school bell', 'play')*Gotta hurry, gotta hurry, gotta hurry ...*
You move as fast as your skinny jeans allow.
The Health classroom comes into view! Time to slow down so you have time to catch your breath and be casually sauntering as you slide past the door.
[[//Alright, slowing down. Looking cool, very cool.// |Joke]]
ALEX ROSE! You spot them! You're like a starving sailor that's sighted a seagull. Never has a keener eye searched, nor a more grateful glance settled on its imminent salvation.
"Oh, hey, Alex Rose," you say, sounding as bored as possible.
Alex Rose stops and looks at you. Could it be -- did they just ... smile?
"Hey."
[[QUICKLY MAKE A JOKE]]
High-risk maneuver there, pal.
But here goes nothing.
[["I got you a cookie, but I eated it." |Ha]]
[["Did you know "rawr" means "I love you" in dinosaur?"|Ha]]HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
OH MY GOD!!
HAHAHAHAHAHA! NO, STOP! HAHAHA! i CAN't!!
hAHAHAHAHAH!11!!one!!
SO GOOD!
THAT JOKE WILL NEVER BE DATED EVER! SO TIMELESS!
[[//Yuck it up, asshole. Alex Rose is laughing.//->Alex Laughs]]"Cool."
[[NICE|CONTINUE]]
You die of happiness (metaphorically).
Alex Rose's bus rolls away, leaving you on the platform with a heart at least 5 sizes too large for your tiny, seventh-grade chest.
You take out your iPod to select some music as you swagger over to your bus. You only own one CD, and you had to manually download the songs from that CD and transfer them to your iPod like a super c00l hax0r.
But the shrill melancholy of your familiar screechy emo music can't dull your glow. It adds a patina of mature melancholy to what can only be described as pure, unadulterated delight. You've never been so happy.
(click: ?page)[To your infinite surprise, a piece of you wants to tell Betty.]
[[THE END]]
(track: 'driving bus', 'play', 'volume', 0.25)
(track: 'driving bus', 'fadeout', 15)Alex Rose stops laughing. The two of you begin walking towards the bus circle together.
"Oh, right! Were you interested in maybe going to that dumb thing? The dance, I mean?"
Holy shit. Ignoring the fact that you just quoted *Hamlet* a second ago -- which I really want to get back to later -- Alex Rose just asked if you wanted to go to the dance.
*Well, they didn't ask if I wanted to go with them.*
Not yet they didn't!! Quickly, answer Alex Rose before they realize you're talking to a disembodied voice in your head. And do not, DO NOT, fuck this up.
[[MAKE CONVERSATION->Conversation]]
Oh, fuck me, Alex Rose actually is.
*Hell yeah.*
Damn. Alright, you got me.
Anyway, now that you've got Alex Rose laughing, it's time to move in for the kill! You can do this, kid! I believe in you!!
//Okay, okay. I can do this. Just gotta jump in. Yeah. Come on. Conscience doth make cowards of us all. Just gotta do it, no thinking.//
[[MAKE A MOVE]]Well, you two have reached the bus circle. Just in time, in fact, for Alex Rose's bus to come around. Alex Rose begins to climb on board, like it's an old-timey train and you're wishing them off before they go to serve in WWII.
*Wait! Alex Rose is turning back!*
You're right! Alex Rose turns briefly and looks back at you.
"Rawr," they say.
[[DIE]]
You examine your domicile. Your dad and step-mom Carol (click-append:"step-mom Carol")[, that bitch,] have decided you are now mature enough to decide on your own room decorations.
//So, whaddya think? Sick fucking crib, right?//
Uh... Sure. I like the neon-green accent wall. It sets off the black walls and purple beanbags beautifully. Oh, and the posters and silver-Sharpie graffiti are... super cool. The garbage all over the floor really brings it all together.
But enough admiration. It's time to get ready for the day. Be quick about it ... the clock is ticking, and you've got a bus to catch.
[[PREPARE->Room - Get Ready]](storylet: when (history:) does not contain "The Closet")The time is nigh. We must get you draped with the threads of a scene kid. Dress for the clique you want to join, not the clique that suits your style and interests. I mean, what style can you possibly have? You're 11.
Dress like your peers; you'll all look back on the photos and laugh in a few years.
It'll be warm, nostalgic laughter, I promise. No cringe here.
[[GET DRESSED ->Dress]]
(storylet: when (history:) does not contain "The Computer")Wait -- are you sure? You've only got so much time to get ready and catch the schoolbus, kid. Are you positive you want to do this?
[[*You know what, better not.*|Room - Get Ready]]
[[*You're not my dad! You can't tell me what to do!*|Check Computer]]
(storylet: when (history:) does not contain "The Wall")You look at your wall. You smile at the Kodak camera photos of you and your best friend Robyn ruffing up your hair and making silly "look at me puff my cheeks out because I'm so goofy and willing to be funny-looking!!" faces. You had walked to Walgreens all by yourself to get those developed!
There are also some h i g h l y aesthetic shots of a single, kohl-lined eye, or your lips in a slight smirk.
*Goddamn I can look pretty cool when I set my mind to it!*
You absolutely can! Never forget it.
[[OBSERVE THE ANCIENT WALL]]
(storylet: when (history:) does not contain "The Vanity")You sit at your vanity. A plastic Phantom of the Opera mask hangs around one of the corners.
The desk itself is covered with several kinds of hairspray (stolen from your step-mom(click-replace:"your step-mom")[that bitch]), a couple combs, more hair ties and hair clips and hair bows than you could ever count, Vaseline, Q-tips, hair brushes, pots of eyeliner and mascara, and an alchemical assortment of plastic bottles filled with pearlescent, colorful liquids that are supposed to smell like abstract things ("Warm Winter's Night"??) but normally just smell like sweetness.
You have a lot of things on this vanity, is what I'm saying.
And that's great, because right now you look like a 12-year-old. Nobody wants to slow dance with a 12-year-old, unless they have coontails and eyeliner.
[[COIFFURE YOUR COIFFURE|Hair]]
[[MAKE UP YOUR MAKEUP|Make Up]]
(set: $makeup to false)
(set: $hair to false)You approach the bus ... but wait! Oh no!
Some 8th graders saw you running to the stop! They saw you adjusting your pants awkwardly as you ran! They're laughing at you.
[[DIE INSTANTLY ]]So when you turn the street corner and see the bus coming to a slow, hissing stop, you don't think to pick up the pace.
*Awesome, yeah! I've got this!* you think to yourself, just as the bus closes its doors and begins its slow crawl school-ward.
*Oh, fuck.*
[[OH FUCK INDEED |Back Home]]
(track: 'driving bus', 'play')Whoops. I'll give you this tip for free, kid:
Don't run places. No hurrying at all, period. Saunter or die.
[[TRY AGAIN->Bus Stop 1]] Whoops. Jokes on you for trying to relate to a man who exclusively wears clothes you can golf in.
[[TRY AGAIN ->Ride]]Without thinking, you stand up and beginning walking to go and get your food. Rookie move, kid.
As you step away from the safe radius of the table and into the open ocean of the cafeteria, you hear a sharp whistle. You turn in horror to see that the vice principal in charge of 7th grade has spotted you. She is pointing at you, specifically. Her chunky-highlighted fringe covers one eye like a pirate, the other glares at you; her frosty pink, brown-lined lips are pursed.
She calls your name and lets the whole cafeteria hear how you have broken protocol and went up to get food without being called.
Didn't you realize, you poor, innocent fool, that your actions are the first step on the short road to anarchy and ruination?
The entire cafeteria begins snickering at your misfortune.
[[BETTER DIE OF EMBARASSMENT THEN]]
(track: 'teenagers laughing', 'play')Never, ever do something on your own initiative, kid. That's what adults are for, didn't you know?
[[TRY AGAIN->Lunch 1]] Before you, a tray of delectable cuisine, the very best and brightest that Sodexo can offer. Or rather, the best that they can spare from the hungry mouths of prisoners.
As it is a THURSDAY, you may eat:
>>(cycling-link: bind $entree, "Teriyaki Beef Nuggets with Weird, Smooth, Plastic-y Rice (6.50)", "Greek Salad Assembled Off-Site and Wrapped in Plastic (13.00)", "Fried Chicken Burger with Wilted Lettuce (5.00)")
[[ANYTHING ELSE?->More Food?]]Perhaps our distinguished guest would care for a beverage?
>>(cycling-link: bind $drink, "Coca-Goddamn-Cola (0.50)","Sprite (0.50)","Dr. Pepper (0.50)","Lemonade (1.00)","Water (2.00)")
A side?
>>(cycling-link: bind $side, "French Fries with More Salt than the Dead Sea (1.00)","Croutons. Just Plain, Dry, Crunchy Croutons. (1.00)","Broccoli (3.00)")
Or even ... dessert?
>>(cycling-link: bind $dessert, "Ice Cream Sandwich (3.50)","Sour Cherry Triangular Popsicles (3.50)","Choco Taco (RIP) (2.00)")
Excellent! You have a meal.
[[PAY UP->Lunch 3]]
What a goddamn masterpiece you've created.
It's you and Alex holding hands next to Jack and Sally.
You've drawn yourself and Alex in a particularly avant-garde style, one clearly influenced by late 19th-century Japonisme. ''Clearly''.
You add the final bold strokes of pen to Alex's hair fringe, skillfully covering their right eye, a masterstroke that is both true to life and also cunningly hides the mismatched eye; art is born of necessity and limitations, my friend. Luckily, the marginalia is covered with single anime-eyes of varying shapes and sizes (why won't you stop doing that??). Hopefully Alex Rose can find one that matches a-la-carte.
[[//WAIT, I'M SENSING SOMETHING//->Bell Preamble]]Good morning, sunshine.
Your alarm is going off. It is NOT a song on your phone because your phone is a Nokia, but if you could set a musical alarm that didn't sound like R2-D2, it would probably be "Helena."
Enough chatter. 7th grade won't attend itself.
Do you:
[[WAKE UP |Opening 2]]
[[HIT SNOOZE |Opening 1]]
(track: 'alarm', 'play')//This is an excellent time management decision.//
Sure, kid. Keep telling yourself that.
Well, since you've decided to check the computer, you're in this. Have at it, kiddo. Where are you gonna check?
(link-storylet: 1, where its name contains "Check MySpace", "//Seen enough.//")
(link-storylet: 3, where its name contains "Check AIM", "//Seen enough.//")
(if: (open-storylets: where its tags contains "website")'s length is 0)[Alright, haven't you seen enough internet for today? The bus will not wait for you.
[[GET A MOVE ON->Room - Get Ready]] ]
(set: $checkcomputer to true)(storylet: when (history:) does not contain "Check MySpace")
Go ahead. [[Frolic]] on your dumb page.
<img src="image/myspace.jpg">
[[GO BACK->Check Computer]] (storylet: when (history:) does not contain "Check AIM")Not much to see here... unless you want to re-read your old messages.
*Are you kidding? I need to set an away message!!*
...or do whatever that is.
[[REREAD ROBYN'S MESSAGES]]
[[SET AWAY MESSAGE]]
(if: $wrong is true)[Wait! Oh, dear.... You see some ominous notifications. This is probably because of that Top 8 business, isn't it? Best leave that for later, kid. You don't need the stress on this day.]
[[ENOUGH ->Check Computer]]You, Robyn, and a few other friends had a party to celebrate you painting your walls a few months ago. You slept in the room that night, which in retrospect might have cost you some brain cells. But ah well, the memories are good.
(You think. You don't have too too many memories of that night because of, you know, the paint fumes.)
Your father and step-mom (click-replace:"step-mom")[that bitch] let you pick one wall to write on in the morning, when everything was dry. You still like to read it sometimes.
"Rawr <3"
"Luv u, beeotch!" (click-append:"beeotch!")[ (..you had to hide that from your parents) ]
"Keep on bein RAD, you smexy beast!"
You smile. (click-append: "smile.")
[
You wonder what Betty might have written for you.]
[[RESUME GETTING READY |Room - Get Ready]]So far, you look like any other early 2000s teen. But you aren't just any teen, are you? You need to get that scene kid credit, goddamnit. And scene kids, regardless of gender or sexuality, require one thing...
IT'S EYELINER TIME.
With a thick, inky pencil and a pink-and-green tube of mascara, you're looking as fine as you ever will.
*Damn, I really do look fine.*
[[ADMIRE YOUR VISAGE->Admire your work 1]]
(set:$makeup to true)<script>
**STORYLET NAVIGATION (ON THE HUB)**
*Go to an open storylet in order*
(for: each _p, ...(open-storylets:))[(link-goto: _p's name) - ]
*Opening up only certain links with tags…*
(for: each _p, ...(open-storylets: where its tags contains "work"))[(link-goto: _p's name) | ]
*Click the link and go-to random open storylet*
(if: (open-storylets:)'s length > 0)[(set: _location to (either: ...(open-storylets:))'s name )
(link-goto: "Go to random room", _location)] (else:) [no more options]
*Listing all available storylets, even if it’s unavailable.*
(link-storylet: 1,where its name contains "insert passage name", "//unavailable//")
(link-storylet: 2,where its name contains "insert passage name 2", "//unavailable//")
**SETTING A PASSAGE TO BE A STORYLET**
*open the storylet when the day reaches a certain point.*
(storylet: when $day >= 0)
*open the storylet ONCE, close it after visiting the page (no repeats)*
(storylet: when visits is 0)
*open the storylet when you've never reached a certain passage.*
(storylet: when (history:) does not contain "apple")
*Mix and match storylet "when"*
(storylet: when $day >= 0 and visits is 0)
</script>
Time to gird your loins for battle, child. Gaze upon your room! Where will you go?
(link-storylet: 1, where its name contains "The Wall", "//Done!//")
(link-storylet: 2, where its name contains "The Vanity", "//Done!//")
(link-storylet: 3, where its name contains "The Closet", "//Done!//")
(link-storylet: 3, where its name contains "The Computer", "//Done!//")
(if: (open-storylets: where its tags contains "room")'s length <=0)[Wait--[[You hear someone]].]"Hey, honey?"
Your father calls.
"It's already 8:45. I think you're gonna miss your bus if you don't hurry."
//OH FUCK! I'M GONNA MISS MY BUS AND DIE!//
For once, your teenage histrionics are appropriate. If you don't catch that bus NOW, you won't get to see Alex Rose before class! How will they ask you to the dance??
[[MOVE, MOVE, MOVE ->Bus Stop 1]] So, good news and bad news. Good news is you're at school. Wait, no. That's kinda bad news.
Well, worse news is that you can't chat with any of your bus-riding friends. The teachers would rather kill you than let kids who take the bus mingle with kids who ride in cars.
//This makes no sense...//
That's because you're not a fascist, my sweet child. You don't understand their mindset. You have but one choice:
[[WAIT FOR SCHOOL TO START ->Morning Education]] You instantly die of embarassment.
(But you probably go straight to heaven, because this is the most morally sound of the choices. Good for you.)
[[TRY AGAIN |Duh]](if: $checkcomputer is false)[(go-to: "Carol")]
(if: $checkcomputer is true)[(go-to:"Dad")]You waddle to the bus stop in the Arizona heat. But you are unhurried, coiffed, dressed, made-up... thriving, honestly.
When the bus arrives, you saunter to the back and plop yourself down. You acknowledge no one. Instead, you put in your iPod headphones and drift away, spending the entire bus ride lost in reverent fantasies of how you would seduce Sesshomaru.
[[INDULGE YOUR FANTASIES ->Day Dream]]Now that you've gathered a modicum of self-confidence, you dare to flit your gaze further down the wall, down to ... The Ancient Photos.
There are bleary pictures of you and your elementary school best friend Betty Finn playing in a backyard blow-up pool. It does give you a pang in your heart when you think of Betty.
//Why did she have to get so lame, man?//
I... can't answer that. But, look! Your cooler, newer, better friends graffitied your wall!
[[READ->Read the graffiti]]
[[RESUME GETTING READY|Room - Get Ready]]Skinny jeans, eh? Daring. Thank God you're a pre-teen and those secondary sex characteristics haven't kicked in in earnest.
Well, you're more or less done with your outfit.
Now, the true gauntlet begins...
//What's a gauntlet? You mean, like, gloves? I've got some green, fingerless mesh ones.//
Uh, wow. Sure.
The true gauntlet, of course, is understood to be when you...
[[ACCESSORIZE]] It's like Coco Chanel said, "Before you leave, take one thing off!"
Except you're the exact opposite. But we're on a time crunch, kid, so you only get to add ''one thing''. Got it?
Choose your accessory before you go.
>>(cycling-link: bind $accessory, "Fuzzy Arm Warmers", "Jelly Bracelets", "Studded Belt", "Hairband (with bow)", "Red-and-Black Skinny Tie", "Beanie", "Trucker Cap", "Fingerless Mesh Glove")
Gorgeous! Admittedly, you feel like you're in a costume, rather than authentically dressing yourself. But whatever, we're all simulating scene kids here. Let's get a move on.
[[RESUME GETTING READY ->Room - Get Ready]] Don't let people close when you've got embarassing shit around, kid. Rule number one.
[[TRY AGAIN->Carol]]Never ignore a provocation, child. It broadcasts your weakness.
[[TRY AGAIN->Day Dream]]Everyone at the table starts laughing. Everyone. At you, who is standing.
The other ho snorts, "By the way, nice $accessory! Did you get it at Limited Too?"
The table erupts in laughter. Your humiliation is complete. Luckily, you perish instantly due to embarassment, so you don't have to linger in this moment.
[[TRY AGAIN->Lunch 1]]
(track: 'teenagers laughing', 'play')You get up from the table and saunter over to Alex Rose. You would walk quickly, but that would be very, very embarassing (obviously). Unfortunately, your cool-kid leisurely pace means you only catch up with Alex Rose as the two of you retrieve trays and begin picking food.
"Oh, hey, Alex Rose," you say shyly.
"Hey," they say, with disaffected indifference.
*Goddamn they're so fucking cool.*
"What're you gonna eat?" Alex Rose asks you.
*Oh, no, I forgot I have to eat! What's the coolest thing to eat?*
Huh. So, you've decided to make your nourishment a life-or-death coolness decision? Nah. I pre-emptively veto this. Choose whatever food you want, it won't hurt you either way.
[[LUNCH DECISION |Lunch Decision]]On to doodling. There's 10,000 bad drawings in you, and it's time to get them out. What's the plan?
//Hm, I'm feeling a little artistically frisky today. I think I should try for a masterpiece.//
Indeed. And what form shall this masterpiece take?
(link-goto:"Romantic Portrait")
(link-goto:"Inuyasha Battle")
(link-goto:"Morbid Landscape")
(link-goto:"Eyes. Just... Eyes")You add the last daring flick of your Bic to an eyelash. The single anime eye stares out at you beneath its feathery lashes. Perfection.
But still, you aren't satisfied. You feel a gravitational pull to draw more and more eyes...
And when you're done, the entire page is absolutely chock-a-block full of single eyes. What an impossibly creepy thing you've done here.
//Whatever, I think it's cool. //
[[//WAIT, I'M SENSING SOMETHING//|Bell Preamble]]//Time to branch out!//
What? Oh -- Is it because you're drawing a tree?
//I mean, yeah. It's a pun. //
Sure. Yeah, super funny.
Anyway, your Gothic rendition of a weeping willow over a graveyard is turning out well! And no one will be AT ALL concerned about the noose you've added to the tree. Oh, wait, is that a flock of bats you're adding in front of the moon? Very atmospheric.
[[//WAIT, I'M SENSING SOMETHING// ->Bell Preamble]]With each furious stroke of the pen, you add kinetic energy to the scene on the page. The sword is only as mighty as the pen that crafts it.
Your OC swings a ferocious scythe-on-a-chain, but Sesshomaru is closing the distance. His lunge, his thrust -- you add diagonal lines to add intensity to them as he moves towards your OC. Now is the time...
Kiss? Or ''KILL''?
[[//WAIT, I'M SENSING SOMETHING//->Bell Preamble]]You feel in your heart that the bell will ring soon. You don't know how you know this, but you do.
The bell will ring in approximately 1 minute and 17 seconds. You feel the timer ticking down in your soul.
[[SURREPTITIOUSLY GATHER YOUR MATERIALS|Bell]]Alright, punk. Let's do this. Alex Rose just said "Oh, right! Were you interested in maybe going to that dumb thing? The dance, I mean?"
//Uhh, what should I say??//
>>Something slick, obviously.
(click-replace: "obviously.")[like, "Yeah, I was thinking about it. Maybe if someone cool asks me."]
>>Something flirty, for sure.
(click-replace: "for sure.")[like, "I dunno... I've already turned a few people down already..."]
>>Something funny, naturally.
(click-replace: "naturally.")[like, "Well, of course! I've got some sick square dance moves."]
>>Something cool, duh.
(click-replace: "duh.")[like, "I dunno. It'll just be a bunch of preps and posers, right? Not my scene."]
//I'll try the (cycling-link: bind $conversation, "slick", "flirty", "funny", "cool") option!//
[[ANSWER ALEX ROSE->Sort Answer]](set: $conversationfailure to it + 1)(if: $conversationfailure is <= 1)[Alex Rose chuckles, but then waits in silence. You didn't give them a lot of room to ask the crucial question, did you?
[[Try again->Conversation]], before you die of embarassment...](else:)[Alex Rose is no longer chuckling.
"Uh, I should, uh, probably go catch my bus. See you later, okay?"
//NO! NO! NO! //
[[DIE->Death 7]]]"Uh, yeah, actually. I did want to go a little. It'll be so lame!! But I think if I went with someone cool, we could laugh about it maybe. That would be fun, right?"
Alex Rose smiles at you. It is perfect.
"Do you think I'm cool?"
Okay, you actually just might die.
BUT NOT FROM EMBARASSMENT!
[[ANSWER ALEX ROSE->Conversation 2]]
(if: $conversationfailure is <=2)[I gotta say, as a dispassionate observer, this one stings. Hard to watch.
You were so close. And now you're dead. Great.](else:)[Woof. It doesn't get any easier, watching you die on this one. I'm begging you to get some goddamn game, kid. I can't keep watching this.]
[[TRY AGAIN->Conversation]](if: $conversation is "slick")[(go-to:"Success")]
(else:)[(go-to:"Failure")]"You? Yeah, you're not bad," you say with a cheeky smile.
Uh, sorry, when the ''fuck'' did you get so smooth?
"Haha, cool. Then maybe I'll, uh, I'll pick you up at six?"
You nod. Despite your best efforts, a smile is on your face and you're blushing.
"Yeah, that'd be pretty cool."
[[SAY COOL ONE MORE TIME]]Congratulations, my friend.
You successfully simulated being a scene kid. For one day, at least. Unless...
You wish to [[try again->SCENE KID SIMULATOR]]?
(link-reveal: "xXmidnightdaggerXx")[: <q>RAWR! *glomps u*</q>
(link-reveal: "shadowintheMorgue")[: <q>somones asking me about... YOU >:3</q>
(link-reveal: "xXmidnightdaggerXx")[: <q>:o WHO??</q>
(link-reveal: "shadowintheMorgue")[: <q>same person whos asking me if you have a crush on anyone...</q>
(link-reveal: "xXmidnightdaggerXx")[: <q>ZOMG TELL ME NOWWWWWW</q>
(link-reveal: "shadowintheMorgue")[: <q>ALYX ROSE!!!!!</q>
(link-reveal: "xXmidnightdaggerXx")[: <q>!!!!</q>
(link-reveal: "shadowintheMorgue")[: <q>i said you didn't have any plans for the dance
tomw. U R WELCOME!</q>
(link-reveal: "xXmidnightdaggerXx")[: <q>g2g!!! carol is telling me to log off...</q>
(link-reveal:"shadowintheMorgue")[:<q>that bitch...</q>
(link-reveal: "xXmidnightdaggerXx")[: <q>byeeeeee~</q>
That revealed nothing we didn't already know. Well then.
[[GO BACK->Check AIM]] ]]]]]]]]]]]<h1><center>[[SCENE KID SIMULATOR]]</center></h1>Fine. In for a penny, in for a melodramatic message that no one will have time to read before school.
Now, what sort of message are we trying to send?
(link-goto:"High Drama")
(link-goto:"Cheeky Fun")
(link-goto:"Swooning Romantic")You're in 7th grade, remember? You don't gracefully own up to your mistakes. Deny, deny, then bury any bodies.
Try again.
[[*Well, shit.* |Back Home]]"dont IM me... too much on my mind :/"
WOOOOOOOW. That'll really get 'em thinking. And surely they won't want to disturb your th-- OH, WAIT! It's reverse-psychology!
People will have no choice but to ask what's on your mind.
Pretty clever, kid. But get a move on, time's ticking!
[[GO BACK->Check AIM]] "hey %n, why are you looking at my profile at %t??"
Oooh, a cheeky bit of code, I see. You are full of surprises, aren't you? Maybe there's a career in this basic-level computing knowledge, provided you stick to it.
Or maybe not.
Anyway, time to get a move on, Pointdexter. Clock's a-ticking.
[[GO BACK->Check AIM]] "could we be like jack and sally?? u know who u are... (≧◡≦)"
Uhhh, wow. Hm. That's certainly sincere. I like the kaomoji, that's a good touch. Really evocative, like a stamp at the end of a love letter. I, uh, don't have much more to say about this one.
We should probably get a move on, kid.
[[GO BACK->Check AIM]] OOF, kid. You're playing with interpersonal fire here. I sure hope you know what you're doing...
You have eight spots. Your friends have profile names (obviously), but in the interest of brevity, I'm going to abbreviate them as RN, EW, KY, AR, XX, ST, TL, and BF.
(You should write these down.)
Alex Rose is AR, Robyn is RN. Betty is BF, and EW (Ebony Way) fully believes that she is a vampire. You hate Ebony, but she's extremely cool and you can't afford to slight her. The other profile names would serve only to confuse you further.
*Okay, got it! I'm going to--*
I'm not done!
[[LEARN MORE]]The two of you reach the cashier. You're up first. Normally, this is an easy transaction. You give the lady your school ID, she subtracts money from the account your parents pay into, you eat your food. But today just can't be normal now, can it?
[[*Oh fuck, what now?* |Lunch 4]]With a gaseous hiss, the bus brakes to a stop and your reverie is broken. You have arrived at the bus circle. But now, you must face a new challenge.
As you step off the bus, you feel the eyes of your peers upon you. You are being provoked...
You turn to see a group of preps staring at you.
What do you do?
[[PUT YOUR MIDDLE FINGER UP AT THEM. |Duh]]
[[IGNORE THEM. |Wrong]]
(track: 'bus brakes', 'play')Absolutely goddamn not. No.
(click: ?page)[//Wait, what the fuck? You're the narrator! I'm the protagonist! I make the choices!//
You think you're making the choices, eh, kid?
Listen here, you do not have the time for this, so I'm putting my digital foot down. <b>NO.</b>
[[//Fine, dick//->Check MySpace]]]Well, you've ignored all my warnings about time management and the importance of getting to the bus on time. Might as well frolic to your heart's content. The damage is done.
*Sweet!!*
[[TAKE A SURVEY]]
[[REARRANGE TOP 8]]
[[EDIT PAGE HTML]]
[[*I'm done!* ->Check Computer]] Oh great. A MySpace survey.
Listen, kid, I'm letting you fill out <b>exactly one</b> survey.
(Remember, you're a seventh-grader in 2005; play along!)
[[FILL OUT SURVEY]]
[[GO BACK->Check MySpace]]{(set: $name to (prompt: "Whatss your name?", ""))
(set: $age to (prompt: "how Old are you?", ""))
(set: $swallow to (prompt: "What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?", ""))
(set: $lotion to (prompt: "do you where Lotion?", ""))
(set: $iraq to (prompt: "sadam hussein. whats his deal?", ""))
(set: $friends to (prompt: "is there anything you wouldn't do for your friends?", ""))
(set: $moralcharacter to (prompt: "would you call yorself a strong person?", ""))
(set: $iraqwar to (prompt: "no, but seriously, what the fuck's going on with Iraq?", ""))
(set: $song to (prompt: "What song are you listening to on repeat rn?", ""))
}<b>Your results:</b>
1. Whatss your name? //$name//
2. how Old are you? //$age//
3. What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow? //$swallow//
4. do you where Lotion? //$lotion//
5. sadam hussein. whats his deal? //$iraq//
6. is there anything you wouldn't do for your friends? //$friends//
7. would you call yorself a strong person? //$moralcharacter//
8. no, but seriously, what the fuck's going on with Iraq? //$iraqwar//
9. what song are you listening to on repeat rn? //$song//
Very convincing imitation of a seventh-grader in 2005, $name.
[[RESUME FROLICKING->Frolic]] You're going to have to write a quick, witty comment on each friend's profile, but only if you've changed their position.
You don't want to write more than five, because that sounds exhausting and (I can't mention this enough), you do not have enough time.
*Okayyy... A little complex, but I think I can--*
HOLD UP. I'm still not done.
[[LEARN MORE->Learn more 2]]We need to get into the social dynamics.
If you're not gonna move Robyn (RN), then you must move XX or KY (or vice versa).
Robyn has to be higher than KY and Betty (BF), or Robyn may have to kill you.
But NOBODY can be higher than Alex Rose (AR).
Betty should probably be at the bottom?
And KY should higher than ST or Ebony (EW), but Ebony has to be higher than at least three people, or she will do something really weird like hiss at you in public.
Remember, you only want to move five people.
Your current order is: RN, EW, KY, AR, XX, ST, TL, BF.
What's it gonna be, kid?
*Uhh...*
[[GIVE UP->Frolic]]
[[REARRANGE]]Choose your top 8:
1. (cycling-link: bind $one, "RN", "EW", "KY", "AR", "XX", "ST", "TL", "BF")
2. (cycling-link: bind $two, "RN", "EW", "KY", "AR", "XX", "ST", "TL", "BF")
3. (cycling-link: bind $three, "RN", "EW", "KY", "AR", "XX", "ST", "TL", "BF")
4. (cycling-link: bind $four, "RN", "EW", "KY", "AR", "XX", "ST", "TL", "BF")
5. (cycling-link: bind $five, "RN", "EW", "KY", "AR", "XX", "ST", "TL", "BF")
6. (cycling-link: bind $six, "RN", "EW", "KY", "AR", "XX", "ST", "TL", "BF")
7. (cycling-link: bind $seven, "RN", "EW", "KY", "AR", "XX", "ST", "TL", "BF")
8. (cycling-link: bind $eight, "RN", "EW", "KY", "AR", "XX", "ST", "TL", "BF")
Are you sure you've followed all the rules? You only moved 5 people? AR's #1 and BF's last? Ebony (EW) is higher than at least 3 people? If you moved Robyn, you didn't move XX or KY (and vice versa)? KY is higher than ST and Ebony?
This is definitely the order you're going with? If so, let's see what happens...
[[FIND OUT]]You chose:
$one, $two, $three, $four, $five, $six, $seven, $eight.
(if: $one is "AR" and $two is "RN" and $three is "KY" and $four is "EW" and $five is "XX" and $six is "TL" and $seven is "ST" and $eight is "BF")[Holy shit! You did it! No angry messages, minimal drama! You managed to rearrange your Top 8. And guess what? You get no reward for it... Other than the satisfaction of a job well done. (set: $wrong to false)
[[*NICE!*->Frolic]]](else:)[And just like that... you hear a flurry of PINGS! from your AOL inbox. It would appear some feathers have been ruffled. Oh dear...(set: $wrong to true)
[[*Oh, well*...->Frolic]]]
alarm: ./audio/alarm.mp3
bus brakes: ./audio/bus brakes.mp3
driving bus: ./audio/driving bus.mp3
girl laughing: ./audio/girl laughing.mp3
hair brushing: ./audio/hair brushing.mp3
hairspray: ./audio/hairspray.mp3
school bell: ./audio/school bell.mp3
teenagers laughing: ./audio/teenagers laughing.mp3showControls: false